8. Cast Away - My Best Friend Can Be Bought at Walmart
We all know Cast Away as the three hour movie that gets played on TV all the time. It's a pretty familiar story: Tom Hanks' plane crashes, he gets trapped on an island, and has to lose a lot of weight to survive. It seems like the perfect opportunity for a film crew to spent lots of money making a deep and affecting movie about the human condition and also get to stay on a tropical island for a few months. And how to pay for this vacation? Lots and lots of brand names. Not only does Tom Hanks work for Fed Ex, with precision and timing normally reserved for only the finest of fascist dictators, but his best friend is also available nationwide for $20. You may think that the volleyball was just an innocent, bloody hand-faced bystander in all of this, but try walking through a sports retailer without crying "Wiiiiilsooon!" every time you pass the volleyball section.
It's not Wilson's fault, but it is his fault I feel guilty looking at a sporting good because he drowned out in that ocean and I did nothing to stop it.