1. Speed 2: Cruise Control
Yes, you knew it was coming. Speed 2 is a completely unnecessary film. The original barely props up its premise of being set on one moving vehicle so why would a sequel manage to do the same? It didn't. Keanu Reeves didn't even come back, that's how bad it is. Just think about that - the man who made The Matrix Revolutions actually turned down a film. Even he saw how atrocious Speed 2 was going to be. It's set on a cruise ship, which explains Willem Dafoe and Sandra Bullock's involvement, which - wouldn't you know it - gets taken over by terrorists who plan to sail it into an oil tanker. Jason Patric from The Lost Boys is drafted in to try and replace Keanu, and bless him, he tries. He really does, but he just can't save this film, no matter how much he tries. The best thing about the film, other than the pun title, is Willem Dafoe's performance as John Geiger. You can always count on Willem to bring it when it comes to hamming up as a villain, and he does so admirably here - bombs hidden in golf balls, a strange mullet hair cut, and he's quite aware how bad it's going to be, so has fun with it and takes it as seriously as he would Hamlet. The direction from Jan de Bont is serviceable, but the increased budget and set sizes mean we get a lot more messing about showing off the money they spent with less focus on the action and story, which made the original so brilliant. The ship crash scene however looks brilliant and apparently is still the holder for the most expensive stunt ever record. I still wouldn't bother watching it, you'll tire of the gimmick quickly.