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10 Sad Facts About Star Wars You Just Need To Accept

10. It's A Toy Factory

It used to be cool that everything in Star Wars appeared in reality as a toy you could own. Lucas found a perfect sweet spot with the original franchise - kids wanted the toys because the movies were so awesome. The crafty bugger even managed to retain the merchandising rights to the franchise, meaning that all that lovely merch money went directly into his fat pocket. Well played, sir. Then greed reared it's head. The prequels were a virtual Argos catalogue, with every frame stuffed to bursting with so much crap that after leaving the theatre it took two months to figure out they were actually rubbish. And every little thing seen on screen found it's way into a toy store near you. The problem was, Lucas was so preoccupied with creating toyable creatures - and beating everyone into quiet compliance with them so we wouldn't forget to buy the figurines - that he forgot he was supposed to throwing a story into the bargain. Let's hope Abrams toes that line a bit more artfully.
Contributor
Contributor

Stuart believes that the pen is mightier than the sword, but still he insists on using a keyboard.