3. WTF Hair - Battlefield Earth
Remember 'Battlefield Earth'? No, I don't either, but you shouldn't worry because by all accounts it's bloody awful. Just look at what they've done to Travolta... they've stuck an eagle on his head! This 2000 flop takes place in a dystopian future, where Travolta is playing an alien with really big and really ugly hair. He looks absolutely ridiculous, with a trail of nose hair swinging from his nostrils. Oh, and has one of the worst evil laughs I've ever heard. It's a half-hearted cackle at best. Along with his melodramatic species, the Psyclos, he's taken control of the the Earth, stripped it of its resources and killed any human who dares to cross them. Oh, those b*tches. It's based on a book by the founder of the Church of Scientology, L. Ron Hubbard, and suddenly this horrid mess and Travolta's involvement makes sense. Travolta is himself of course a devoted Scientologist - a group of deluded nut-jobs who believe aliens brought us to our planet, and put souls in a volcano, and now those alien souls are in us... or something. Hey, maybe it was the Psyclos? If that's the case, I'm ashamed to have had any connection with a race who clearly haven't heard of a hair brush. To clarify then: this is one of John's worst movies, and one of his worst looks. Just in case you missed the point.