10 Things Valerian And The City Of A Thousand Planets Gets Hopelessly Wrong

8. The Opening Heist Makes No Sense

Valerian Dane Dehaan
EuropaCorp

Valerian's first acts of derring-do involve a heist on from a market that exists in a different dimension. The super-tech doesn't bear too much thinking about, but the point here is that the plan makes no sense. Valerian is given a magic box that lets his hand interact with the target dimension, while a super-tech doohickey makes him invisible.

And they send him in alone. Alone. For no reason.

Presumably the Earth government has access to more than one set of this stuff. But no, the smirking hero is left to pull all this off himself with his backup milling around in completely the wrong dimension being of no help whatsoever. It would be fine if there was a reason for Smuggy McProtagonist to go solo, but there isn't. The only reason is that he's the hero.

Then the entire backup team except Valerian and Loreline die horribly without anyone caring or indeed seeming to notice. Nice going, supercop.

Contributor

Ben Counter is a fantasy and science fiction writer, gaming enthusiast, wrestling fan and miniature painting guru. He was raised on Warhammer, Star Wars and 1980s cartoons that, in retrospect, were't that good. Whoever you are, he is nerdier than you.