10 Unfilmable Books That Would Make Great Films

1. A Confederacy Of Dunces, John Kennedy Toole

confederacy of dunces Who would play Ignatius J Reilly? John Belushi and John Candy are both dead. Will Ferrell was linked to the role but the idea has been rubbished by fans of the book. Perhaps Philip Seymour Hoffmann or Jon Goodman were the only men who could pull it off. But they€™re both probably a bit too old now. Jack Black anybody? Out of the darkness, step forward one Zach Galifianakis of Hangover fame. It seems he may be the only one who could now pull of the role. But should a film version of this wonderful novel be made at all? The educated but lazy and excessively gluttonous Ignatius J Reilly is a heavyweight of world literature. True, in terms of plot, A Confederacy of Dunces probably has just enough to go by for a film version. At 30 years old and still living with his mother, Reilly finally gets a job, excels at it, and meets a cast of bizarre people on the way. He hates modern culture and revels in citing ancient philosophies like Boethius€™ wheel of fortune as a way of excusing his shortcomings. But the plot is the character, that€™s the problem And would Hollywood get the subtle bits in? That Toole has based his novel loosely on Boethius Consolations of Philosophy would surely be the first sacrifice. That no reader can attempt a Confederacy of Dunces without the knowledge of the author€™s suicide and so this heart-rendering story is laced with sadness from the outset. That you just can€™t separate the sadness with the humour in this incredible novel. And if the film version was too much of one without the other it would be a betrayal of the book€™s very essence. And what of The Big Easy? Toole€™s portrayal of New Orleans with its odd dialect and even odder characters makes for a great read. Would it make for a great watch? Well I think it would actually. A Confederacy of Dunces only made it to publication through the endless battling of Toole€™s mother and then by a solitary publisher on her behalf. So if a director could show the same determined spirit then maybe the film version would be a wonderful testament to the city and the story in a post-Katrina, visual context . Whether Galifianakis is the right choice to convey the Ignatius magic is unknown. Could he manage it? All of it? The sarcasm, the moaning, the outrageous sense of betrayal? That certain unique strain of hypochondria-meets- melancholia? Would that renegade pyloric valve be as funny in film as it was on the page? One things is for sure; if Hollywood botch this iconic protagonist we would never forgive them. The stakes don€™t come any higher than this.
 
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Contributor

David Hynes is a freelance writer, working in print, online, on stage and for screen. A film and book enthusiast, he has just finished his first novel.