Well, this one is just asking for trouble, isn't it? Remaking classic Hitchcock is bad enough, after all, but this... this one has just gone too far. Why, you wonder? What could possibly peg this remake as so inherently terrifying that it might actually make you want to reconsider your entire love of the medium of cinema? Imagine a remake of The Birds... produced by Michael Bay. That's right: this upcoming and very real reimagining of one of Hitch's greatest films will have Michael Bay's name stamped all over the credits. Already you can just picture scenes of birds dive-bombing civilians and exploding into flames and feathers as pre-teen girls desperately try to avoid death from above. It has all the makings of a disasterpiece. No, Michael Bay is not directing the movie - Dutch filmmaker Diederick Van Rooijen has somehow been lured into taking on that inexplicable task - but he didn't direct Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, either, and look how that turned out. Only in 2015 could there be a Michael Bay-led remake of The Birds in the works. Look at where we are, civilisation.
Sam Hill is an ardent cinephile and has been writing about film professionally since 2008. He harbours a particular fondness for western and sci-fi movies.
