10 Upcoming Sequels And Reboots That Will Destroy Your Faith In Cinema

1. Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

Ghostbusters 2016
Disney

Johnny Depp’s Oscar-nominated turn as Captain Jack Sparrow in Pirates Of The Caribbean: The Curse Of The Black Pearl generated so much goodwill that people were willing to pay to see the character return in three bloated, incoherent and repetitive sequels, proving that a modern crowd will sit through anything as long there’s jokes and special effects.

Sequel #4 offers the same old same old all over again: Captain Jack encounters a vicious nemesis played by a slumming thespian (Javier Bardem, in this case), and a series of no doubt hilarious contrivances mean he must seek out a powerful artefact that grants the owner powers untold. Such as the ability to fool some people all of the time.

Orlando Bloom’s character returns this time around, and the actor has promised the movie will be a “soft reboot” of the previous instalments. Remember that phrase. It will be bandied around greatly, as if it actually means something. 

Still got faith in movies? How? Share any other dire looking upcoming movies down in the comments.

In this post: 
ghostbusters
 
First Posted On: 
Contributor

Ian Watson is the author of 'Midnight Movie Madness', a 600+ page guide to "bad" movies from 'Reefer Madness' to 'Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead.'