1. (Almost) Everyone in Batman and Robin
At this point in the article, I hope my readers understand my loathing for
Joel Schumachers Batman films. Just about every critic and fan out there hangs Batman and Robin by the neck as often as possibleits just that easy to beat up. First off, there are no nipples that can make Bat-nipples look good. Secondly,
George Clooney is great a saving lives on ER and robbing banks in the Oceans franchise, but he stinks as Batman. I wont even mention Robinwell just pretend he only exists in the cartoons and with Adam West. The (former)
Governator Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze is perhaps one of the most disturbing ideas ever invented. Freeze is supposed to be grandly intelligent and obsessed with the loss of his wife, not over-the-top, cheesy, and just plain stupid. Although I suppose they got the strong part of Freeze right. To the Batgirl idea, I say: Why? Ill just leave that one alone. I guess someone had to act for Banes character. Well, if you call grunting behind a bad Luchadore mask with dog-collar spikes acting, I guess it could be something resembling not bad. About the only pieces this film cast correctly were
Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy and
Michael Gough as Alfred, who they inherited from the Tim Burton films. Some will disagree with me on the Poison Ivy choice, but had there been a better filmmaking team, she would have been amazing. The biggest people to blame for both Joel Schumacher films are those that hired him to make Batman in the first place. Maybe if Batman was becoming a Broadway Musical (which it did), Schumacher would have been an excellent choice to direct. Instead, Bat-fans everywhere will have an image forever cemented in our memories of bat-nipples other ridiculous things. Thank you, Christopher Nolan, for making Batman awesome again.