3. Lois' Poem - Superman
You know what the kids love? Poetry. Or at least that's clearly what Richard Donner and Mario Puzo thought when making Superman. When Lois and Superman take off for their romantic flight through the night sky, she expresses her barely concealed sexual delight by reciting a poem in her head in the hope that he is reading her mind and will immediately ravage her among the clouds. The poem, which was written by a group of lovelorn teenagers in a focus group put together for traumatised fans of discontinued boy bands (probably) went as follows:
Can you read my mind? Do you know what it is that you do to me? I don't know who you are. Just a friend from another star. Here I am, like a kid out of school. Holding hands with a god. I'm a fool. Will you look at me? Quivering. Like a little girl, shivering. You can see right through me Can you read my mind? Can you picture the things I'm thinking of? Wondering why you are All the wonderful things you are. You can fly! You belong in the sky! You and I Could belong to each other. If you need a friend I'm the one to fly to If you need to be loved Here I am! Read my mind.
Could she have been more aggressive in her sexual availability? The scene is horribly corny, and far more suited to either Superman III or IV in that respect, and it adds a stupid blatancy to a romantic scene that didn't need anything added to its subtle dynamic. Then of course there are the concerns about the science of the scene. Superman is strong, and basically magic since he isn't actually subject to any conventional rules (which are written around with gleeful abandonment in the interest of spectacle or drama throughout the franchise) but there is no way that this is possible...
Lois Lane would have to have the core strength of a pilates master to maintain a straight enough arm to hold her frame horizontal, unless Superman is somehow controlling all of her muscles with his grip, which is probably not all that difficult to imagine since he can spin the world backwards and wipe people's memory with a kiss.