Another year, another slew of young adult adaptations that disappointed at the box office. The fact that 'from Stephenie Meyer, author of The Twilight Saga' was such a hugely prominent part of the marketing effort for this awful movie shows how cynical the studios have become when looking for the next smash-hit literary series to adapt. Essentially a tale of alien body-snatchers but really another 'epic love story' (yawn), The Host offers no tension, no suspense, no humor and at over two hours, drags on for what seems like an eternity. Saoirse Ronan is a great actress and Andrew Niccol a talented director with the right material, and both deserve much better than this unintentionally hilarious, poorly scripted, incredibly tedious movie. It tanked at the box office of course, grossing less than $50m worldwide but judging from 2014's movie calendar the studios are still looking for the 'next Harry Potter/Twilight/Hunger Games/delete where applicable'. I wish they would give it a rest. Runner-Up: Carrie On paper, this seemingly pointless remake of Brian de Palma's 1976 classic (rumored to be more heavily influenced by the novel) had a strong pedigree; Kimberly Peirce had proven herself capable of directing strong female characters, the cast was headed by two of the best actresses of their respective generations in Chloe Grace Moretz and Julianne Moore, the basic concept of the narrative lent itself well to a modern re-imagining, and a late October release saw it poised to do big Halloween business. The end result however, is unforgivably bland. There are good remakes and bad remakes, but the worst reaction any movie can get is an impassive shrug, and that's how I felt after watching Carrie. The direction, production design, performances and effects are all nothing more than okay, which is massively disappointing given the talent assembled. Another year, another unnecessary remake of a horror classic.
I don't do social media, so like or follow me in person but please maintain a safe distance or the authorities will be notified. Don't snap me though, I'll probably break. I was once labelled a misogynist on this very site in a twenty paragraph-long rant for daring to speak ill of the Twilight franchise. I stand by what I said, it's crap.
