4. The Falling-Apart Captain's Log
Part of the premise of this film is that the fancy, new Enterprise we saw at the end of Star Trek IV was actually built really poorly. Everything is falling apart, the transporters dont work, the computer has a weird-sounding voice. And then the crew of the Enterprise must take her out to rescue some people from a crazed Vulcan: hilarity ensues. The worst part about this, for me, was the point where Kirk is recording his entry for the Captains log, in the typical voice-over of an exterior shot of the Enterprise. But then mechanical noises erupt, and we see that the Captains Logwhich is actually a computer in the shape of a logbookhas broken. Some panel pops out, and Kirk sends it away in disgust. Why is this so bad? The idea that Starfleet Command would send a ship that barely works out on a crucially important mission strains belief. If they wanted us to take this plot point seriously, it had to be as realistic as possible. So why would you put in a computerized logbook that falls apart as Kirk is recording? I get that maybe the Enterprise was shoddily constructed. But did they also pull out the shoddily-constructed Captains Logs for the occasion? Did the same lazy crew that put together the transporter also make the little gadgets that I had assumed just fill up a storage closet someone on the Starbase? Im sure it was added as comedic effect, but it just combined with the other ridiculous momentsand the many more to cometo ruin this movie.