1. "Row row row your boat"
Those of you who have seen the film probably thought I overlooked the campfire scene shortly after Spocks Superman dive. Kirk, Spock and McCoy gather at their campsite, drink and eat, and start singing a round of row-row-row your boat, except Spock
hilariously tries to understand the lyrics meaning instead of singing. I didnt include it because an even worse sing-along happens at the end of the movie. God turns out to be some kind of evil hologram who gets blown up, the Klingons who were attacking the Enterprise apologize, and everyone gathers in the ships party room to celebrate. Kirk, Spock and McCoy have a touching conversation that references Kirks earlier soliloquy on why people like them will never have a family; it turns out, they are each others family. Then we cut to a campfire, where the three are singing row-row-row your boat. Why is this so bad? Really? I forgive Kirks philosophizing as another Shatner moment, but I cannot abide a sing-along in a Star Trek movie. Maybe, somehow, you made it through goofy desert-dwellers, thruster boots, falling apart starships, naked fan dances, etc. etc. etc., and still thought this was a worthwhile movie. Well, then, just to be clear, the movie hits you with one of the cheesiest endings in a science fiction film ever. Ever
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