1. Bill Murray Is A Better Musician Than You
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nh9HdpqOaXo Not content with being one of Hollywood's few true heroes, Murray is also handy with an axe. You might think your ropey Johnny Cash impression in the shower after a night out and too many cigarettes/shandies sounds all right (it doesn't) but Murray can hold an audience and a note or two. Admittedly, he does have access to some damn fine guitarists for valuable tips (see Seu Jorge, The Life aquatic) but his version of Gloria is far more preferable than listening to you crudely hammer out Smoke on the Water with the subtlety of a drunken brown bear trying to get into a honeypot. When he's not missing out on roles because he doesnt have an agent, and his voicemail is linked to a local supply store, Sir Bill can be found crashing karaoke parties of strangers. Right, so that only happened once. Nevertheless, how good would that be?! I'd happily blurt the rest of my overdraft to watch him perform Wham's Club Tropicana or something equally ridiculous. Bill, you're a god and if you were the God, I'd pray in your house of worship every day.
Stephen Roberts
Contributor
Out of touch, out of date and out of work. With no other discernible skills of any real use to society, I thought I'd give this a bash. My main focuses are food, music, sport and anything remotely related to ISS Pro 98. I spend half of my life listening to records and the other half wondering whether it'd be possible to become John Cooper Clarke's mate. He, alongside Stephen Fry and Countdown's Rachel Riley, should run the country.
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