ENCHANTED

Kevin Lima Written by Bill Kelly Starring Amy Adams, Patrick Dempsey, James Marsden, Susan Sarandon,Timothy Spall, Idina Menzel, Rachel Covey, Julie Andrews (narrator) Available in the U.S. on March 18th, 2008 at Amazon for $14.99! Available in the U.K. on July 4th, 2008 for some reason. You can buy it at Play for £11.99!! Disney finally plumbs the depths of their own cliches in order to weave together a story about a cartoon princess who becomes real. This box office smash had an enchanted run all the way through Oscar season ... and now it prepares to bewitch the DVD market. THE FILM While I do love some of Disney's early cartoon classics, my least favorite ones were the "princessy" films: Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty. Maybe it's because I'm a guy - I dunno - but I never enjoyed the stupid, overly-happy tunes and prepubescent love stories. Give me Bambi, or Dumbo ... hell, I'd even take The Fox and the Hound over one of those movies. With Enchanted, Disney attempts to mock its past cartoons and answer the taunts levelled against them by the Shrek films. The story is paint-by-the-numbers: a young princess named Giselle, having fallen in love with a prince named Edward, finds herself the target of an angry and jealous queen. Convinced that Giselle is out to steal her authority, the Queen sends Giselle through a magic waterfall and into the real world. Soon, Edward gives chase through the real world, aided by a faithful chipmunk named Pip. Eventually, though, Giselle learns the meaning of true love in the arms of a divorce lawyer. The entire movie would be unbearable to anyone with a cock and over the age of ten, but it is saved due to a magnificent lead performance by Amy Adams. Although her character is fairly annoying at first, Adams manages to supply Giselle with real depth and charming innocence. The rest of the cast is decent, with Susan Sarandon and James Marsden apparently having a blast as the Queen and Edward, respectively. The technical aspects of the production are top-notch. Director Kevin Lima maintains a crisp pace while showing some inventiveness in composition. The special effects - except for a fairly lame dragon at the end - are impressive and mostly seamless. Bizarrely, I found the Oscar-nominated songs to be either limp or irritatingly long, with only That's How You Know making any kind of lasting impression. The choreography in most of these sequences is amazing and very fluid. Overall, it's a cute and lightweight film, and probably perfect for anyone with a little girl in the family. However, there will not be even one slight surprise for anyone older than ten and familiar with films like Splash. And if you're a straight male, you might want to skip it entirely unless you want to get laid afterward. TECHNICAL The film looks bright and perfectly scrubbed. My only complaint with this disc - like most Disney DVD's - are the massive amounts of commercials and previews tacked onto the front section of the DVD. Wading through several minutes of corporate shill in order to watch a damn movie is a pain in the ass. EXTRAS This is a fairly thin, one-disc set. The bonus features include several deleted scenes, as well as a blooper reel. Neither one are worth watching. The standard behind-the-scenes film concentrates on the three musical numbers in the film, with a look at the special effects used to bring them to life. I was particularly surprised at how many real animals were used in the production. It's definitely nice to see that CGI has not (yet) replaced every living thing in motion pictures. The last bonus feature involves a fairly ridiculous pseudo-popup adventure starring Pip the chipmunk. Very stiffly and cheaply animated, the film is a pointless eyesore. It does nothing to advance the main story or the characters; it's basically just DVD padding. OVERALL This DVD will be perfect for any family with little kids, women who fondly remember their childhood, or straight men who either want a blowjob from their significant other, or want to turned gay. Just kiddin' about the gay part ... mostly. I just want you to understand that this is a very, very, VERY girlie movie. Overall, it's a decent - and overhyped - film.

Movie Rating: 3 out of 5

DVD Rating

rating: 3