10 Ways Film Geeks Can Survive A Zombie Apocalypse
5. Dont Read Anything Out Loud, No Matter How Good An Idea It Seems At The Time
In the zombie-verse, the only two things ever get read out loud: gnomic clues as to the actual cause of to the zombie apocalypse scrawled on a scrap of paper by a discredited and eccentric professor and left in his abandoned laboratory; and sections of ancient, sacred texts which inevitably lead to the raising of hordes of undead ghouls. M.R. James ghost stories tend to feature a fair bit of this sort of thing, and the particularly irritating part is that the evil spirits or undead tend to use the person who first said the words as a kind of transdimensional homing beacon. The Evil Dead trilogy is a case in point: if theres a tape knocking about in an abandoned log cabin, chances are its not going to be a copy of Fleetwood Macs greatest hits. Dont stick it on while youre doing the hoovering or whatever, you might accidentally awaken the undead.
