Leonardo DiCaprio: Ranking Every Performance From Worst To Best
25. Derek - Dom's Plum
Sorry, did you say Dom's... Plum? Plum, as in, the fruit? WTF is this movie about? Pretty much, it's Leo sitting in a diner booth for an hour and a half being generally detestable, and MY GOD he won't stop talking. This movie wasn't even supposed to be released, apparently: DiCaprio reportedly made it as a favour to a friend with his buddy Tobey Maguire. He's... not great in it.
24. Josh - Critters 3
Leo is just a kid in Critters 3, and though he isn't particularly bad in this movie, he's not particularly good, either. The reason for that should be obvious: this movie is called Critters 3. How did Critters make it to a third movie, even? WTF is a Critter? If you're imagining something along the lines of a Gremlin, then yeah, that. Anyway, this flick marked Leo's debut role - and he's probably better here than he was in both The Beach and Don's Plum. Which says a lot about those roles.
23. Arthur Rimbaud - Total Eclipse
Don't pretend you know what this is. Seriously, you're not fooling anybody. This little-seen movie focuses on the turbulent relationship between two poets, Paul Verlaine - played by David Thewlis - and Arthur Rimbaud - Leonardo DiCaprio - who sort of bicker their way through 19th century France, getting on each others nerves and occasionally stopping to talk about poetry. Oh, Thewlis' character has a big crush on DiCaprio's character in the movie, so there's that... but it's an otherwise missable performance from our favourite Hollywood star, sadly.
22. Brandon Darrow - Celebrity
Minor Woody Allen movie, minor DiCaprio performance. There's not much to like about this movie, really, and DiCaprio's character - who is presumably supposed to represent a bizarro world parody of himself or something - is so unlikeable that sitting through Cassandra's Dream ten times in a row would be more fun than sitting down to a meal with him. So Leo is a jerk; Kenneth Branagh does a Woody Allen impression for two hours - no thanks, actually.
