6. Laserblast (1978)
Summary: The story begins when a UFO lands on Earth, shoots a guy with a weird gun on his arm, and then they leave. Then some young buffoon stumbles along and finds the gun, attaches it to his arm (of course he does!), and starts shooting things. Then he begins morphing into an alien.
*SPOILERS, LIKE YOU REALLY CARE* Then the aliens come back to Earth, shoot him too, and the movie ends.
Why It Stinks: Well, completely ignoring that surprisingly accurate plot summary, the movie really doesn't know what to do with itself. There's about thirty minutes of boredom until the kid gets the gun, and after that it's nothing but him shooting stuff. The sad thing is, out of all the films featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000, this one could have held the most promise. It had some genuinely good actors in it (Roddy McDowell and Keenan Wynn for instance), the makeup effects were shockingly good... in fact, nearly all the special effects were impressive for a film of this budget. And yet, the movie still falls short. Painfully short.
In case you were wondering, Leonard Maltin gave this movie 2 1/2 stars. Out of four. Just saying.
Sample:Best Riff: "I'd like to teach the world
to get ready for some football!"