Ranking EVERY James Bond Henchman From Worst To Best

23. Mischka & Grischka (Octopussy, 1983)

Tee Hee James Bond
MGM/UA

Dressed like circus performers and with knife skills to match, twin assassins Mischka and Grischka are here to eliminate - not entertain.

The terrible twosome first make themselves known at the beginning of Octopussy, murdering a double-oh agent who's inexplicably dressed as a clown.

That pretty much sets the tone going forward, with some surprisingly grisly and violent undertones often jarring with the film's colourful, bombastic, even camp atmosphere.

Despite their odd attire, Mischka and Grischka aren't treated as a pair of bumblers. As Kamal Khan's hired hitmen, they're a lethal duo who'd just as easily kill a man as blink - provided they get to use their trusty blades.

How fitting that a pair of siblings who'd clearly shared so much in their lives get to share the same killer. 007 dispatches one brother by causing a cannon to fall on his head and the other with one of his own beloved knives.

Unlike a lot of the film, however, none of this is played for laughs. Sir Roger Moore's James Bond is avenging his fallen comrade, and in a rare moment of darkness, is all too glad to do it.

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Chest thumping James Bond and Haruki Murakami fanatic living in China. Once had a fever dream about riding a rowboat with Davos Seaworth. He hasn't updated this section since Game of Thrones was cool, and boy does it show.