Shaun Says RARE EXPORTS: A CHRISTMAS TALE Is An Original If Overly Slight Xmas Horror
rating: 3
Ambitious, thematically dark Christmas films are like cinematic gold dust - The Nightmare Before Christmas and Bad Santa being among the few memorable ones and the Finnish Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale, though an unfocused dillution of the two shorts it was based on, is a fiercely original, superbly-premised take on the original Santa Claus myth. Atop the mysterious Korvantunturi Mountains, a group of scientists are supposedly conducting research into the areas seismic activity. However, the truth is far more sinister (not to mention hilarious); they have uncovered the perfectly preserved resting place of the original Santa Claus. Far from the commercialised Coca Cola Santa Claus we are more familiar with, he is a bloodthirsty, savage being with uncanny strength, keen to punish the apparently wicked children of the local village. When Rauno (Jorma Tommila), a local hunter, discovers his reindeer haul has been slaughtered, he sets out to discover the culprit, and after discovering the truth decides that, alongside his colleagues and his son Pietari (Onni Tommila), Santa must be stopped at any cost. So brilliant are Jalmari Helanders two original shorts 2003s Rare Exports Inc. and 2005s The Official Rare Exports Inc. Safety Instructions that any director would have struggled to live up to their wide popularity and the considerable expectations surrounding a feature-length article. This 82-minute version barely qualifies as an expansion of the source material, in as much as it essentially recycles the short plots verbatim, while buffing out the remaining running time with an overlong, pointlessly expository build-up and some unconvincing, totally unsurprising plot twists. Likely to be more alluring to those unfamiliar with the short versions, it is nevertheless a well-made, mildly amusing, and clever if ultimately underwhelming subversion of the tiresomely feel-good Christmas film.
Never anything less than tongue-in-cheek, the sci-fi inspired treatment of Santas defrosting is agreeably daft, but Helander becomes unstuck when misguidedly aiming for suspense and tension. Seemingly unaware that the majority of people watching his film will have seen the shorts, Helander packs his film with build-up comprising almost half the pictures runtime, a frustrating decision given how we all know where it is going. This isnt to say that Helander rests entirely on the laurels of his shorts characters are fleshed out and Santas rampage is totally expanded but to shoehorn subdued enigma into a blatantly obvious, not to mention nutty, premise does not equate to good business or clever filmmaking. Once the characters eventually, finally engage with the notion that, yes, they are facing off against the Santa Claus (and St. Nick finally gets some face time), the film branches off a tad from the shorts, resulting in a few genuinely hilarious moments, though again, anything positioned as a surprise has been spoiled for anyone acquainted with the shorts. Rather than anticipate his audience and perform a cheeky swerve of expectation, Halender has rather lazily traced the path of his earlier work, optimistically hoping a late-day set-piece featuring more slow-motion, swinging penises than cinema has ever seen will save the day, even if it is more an elaboration of an idea from the short rather than anything profoundly new. That the Queen Alien-type reveal never comes despite some frustrating teasing is also massively disappointing. 
Brevity is the soul of wit, and while Helander seems to understand this with his snappy runtime, there is only barely enough new material here to justify a feature production, despite the impressive performances from the mostly unknown cast. Certainly funnier and more forgiving in its concise short form, Rare Exports is still worth a watch for anyone jaded by yet another Winter of saccharine feel-good fare and endless TV repeats of The Great Escape and Its A Wonderful Life. 
Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale is in theatres now.