They'd all be deserving of a place on this list individually I'm sure (except the Chocobo chick, who was brill) but the cast of the 13th entry in the Final Fantasy series are all about as interesting as listening to a lecture on the history of outboard motors presented by a dull man with a suspicious moustache. Despite this fact they've gone on to now be in three whole games, with series creators Square Enix blatantly ignoring fans' disdain for the characters and plowing ahead regardless. Let's talk about why everyone's annoying in greater detail, shall we? Lightning - Even moodier than Squall (and that's saying something), unrelatable and dull. Has pink hair and a sword thingy. That's about it. Snow -Far too nice for his own good. Also wears a silly coat and silly hat and has a girlfriend who looks like a tiny tiny person when stood next to him. Hope - The whiny kid of doom who constantly whines about everything that happens and doesn't get any better over time. Vanille - The bundle of energy with an Australian accent. Nerve-grating Fang - The stoic warrior, with an Australian accent. Basic carbon copy of Lightning, with less pink hair. Sazh - Has a fro and a child. Has a bird that lives in his fro, which is more interesting. So yeah, there's the characters. Good job the world was full of things to explore and see and do and all that right? Oh...yeah...it wasn't was it? Give me Cloud, Squall, Zidane, Tidus and all their supporting cast over these guys any day.
Dan Curtis is approximately one-half videogame knowledge, and the other half inexplicable Geordie accent. He's also one quarter of the Factory Sealed Retro Gaming podcast.
