6 Things About the Pokemon Games That Defy Logic

2. You Are Not Just a Child, But an Emotionally Devoid, Lifeless Machine

You can sleep, but you don't. You don't eat. You never stop walking, running, or bike-riding. You have a mother, but it's perfectly plausible she and your father forged you from the fires of the underworld to wreak havoc on the PokeWorld and save mankind. You're as far away from being human as the Pokemon are. You, personally, are never in any real danger; just your Pokemon. Hell, when the going gets tough, you even get unpluggedand wake up where you last saved. Yeah, you black out, reboot, and everything is a-okay again. You, probably named "FetusMaster" or "SlitherTongue" or "Ed," are a monster to everyone around you. You train endlessly, sweep through the gym leaders (something that probably takes the "real" inhabitants of the game years) and catch up to a hundred Pokemon in a span of about four hours. Not only that, but you also have the persuasive power of the gods, as you are literally given the power not only to name Pokemon, but rename people who have been on this earth for ten+ years. You are feared, respected, and should probably be locked in a basement somewhere until the time of Revelation is upon us. Oh, and you're ten.