9. Minnie and Santa Cyndi Lauper
Next up from the North Pole is the innocently titled 'Minnie and Santa' by Cyndi Lauper, which featured on her Christmas album with the passive-aggressive title 'Merry Christmas... Have a Nice Life'. Featuring lyrics such as: "And there where she'd hung up her stockings/ All in their silky, soft, sheen/ She'd be laying in wait on a bear skin rug/ Where the cookies and milk could be seen" it's pretty clear that Minnie is going to get more than a rummage in Santa's sack. Not one for the kids, and you'll definitely never look at milk and cookies the same way again.