20 Things You Are Never Told About Being In A Band

17. Guarantees? Yeah, They€™re Not So Guaranteed

Moon Sam Rockwell GifSony Pictures ClassicsAfter years of playing shows for the joy of doing it and maybe a free beer or two, there will come a point when you're established enough to start demanding guarantees - also known as the holy grail, or a fixed fee for your band's performance. For out of town shows, or gigs where you have to haul gear across the country, these modest payments are essential to making the evening worthwhile and not just a bank account raping expense. But sadly, quite often the show will either go to hell or the promoter just won't feel like paying you, and instead you're left with a pat on the back and some dirty equipment. Not quite living the dream you thought you'd be.

16. Wow You€™re In A Band?! No One Cares

tumblr.comtumblr.comYou may have noticed, but everyone knows someone in a bloody band. When you're sixteen and can't go out drinking, going to local gigs is the height of cool, and local bands generally get a lot of respect. Then people grow up and go drinking and clubbing, and sadly stop giving a damn. No matter how amazing the bill you're on, or how genuinely great your new EP is, the older you get the harder it is to get anyone to care. Want a devoted fan base? Time to start playing squeaky clean pop-punk and you'll get the adoring kids that you all crave. No, not like that. You sicko.

15. At First, You€™ll Suck

LucasfilmLucasfilmAfter weeks of talking up your latest musical endeavour, and scouring through gumtree to find a drummer, you'll eventually find yourself with your new bandmates in a rehearsal room. After jamming for a few months you'll start thinking you're hot stuff and book yourself some shows. What no one's told you however, is that you actually suck. Don't worry though - its basically first gig tradition to be pretty awful, as its hard to nail down your song writing and live performance first time. Don't be disheartened, just go back and keep practicing until you're tighter than that one relative who only ever gives you £5 book tokens for Christmas.
 
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Having written for Official Playstation Mag, Godisageek and obviously What Culture. Tom is a London based writer who loves him some games. You may also find his articles lurking in the film and comic sections on rare occasions.