Uncovered: Robin Thicke, Battleaxe, Trivium

Codd Listening to music is hard. Arduous even. Most people don't understand how difficult it is to be a music reviewer. Every day it seems like there are more bands than the last. You can destroy the career of one band and end up with 4 solo careers. It's insane! In 2012 alone, a whole whack of albums were released. That's a lot of albums. That's more albums than most people will spend listening to in their entire lives. And yet the lofty music reviewer is expected to, nay, DEMANDED of the public to give MY FAVOURITE BAND a fair shake. To that I say pish tosh and bother. The music industry has its expectations and relies on the major blogging authority to produce content that will move units. That will convince you, the reader, to buy a piece of plastic you will wind up trading in at the used goods establishment. And what's your return on investment? Assuaging the feeling of guilt that you have "supported the artist". That and a buck fifty will get you a cup of coffee. But what of the time wasted on millions of reviews? I have better things to do than subjecting myself to music I hate, however, this does not negate my court-mandated obligation to provide the reader with a catty opinion. What is your intrepid writer to do? I know! I'll review their covers instead!
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Aaron J. Marko is a literary magnate living in Canada. He is currently working on The Great American Novel about teenage orange salesmen in California. Do not add me to Google+. You will regret it. Available for birthday parties and bar mitzvahs.