8. I Like *insert something obscure here*
Are you ready? Because here comes my dating website horror story. When I first started using a particular site, it was soon after my first real relationship ended. I was heartbroken, which in hindsight was just on account of me being new to relationships and not knowing any better. Yet I thought there was no better distraction than to go on more dates and that dating websites was as good a way to get them as any. Soon thereafter, I started a lengthy conversation with a girl I remember, in the infatuation phase, referring to as the cutest girl I'd ever seen. With how swimmingly we were getting along online, I tried to set up a time for us to meet in person. First, I suggested we go see Water for Elephants, since she'd mentioned loving the book. Apparently, though, she'd made plans weeks ago to see it with friends of hers. Next I suggested the latest Pirates of the Caribbean movie. This time, she had other plans. For my third attempt, I can't quite remember what my suggestion was, but I do remember her waiting until the last minute to tell me she'd changed her mind, that she was feeling down and wouldn't be good company. Fourth time was the charm, though, with us meeting up at Kennywood for what went on to be the most awkward date I've ever been on. I've come to terms with the fact that I can be rather awkward, but throw me together with someone just as, if not more, awkward and there's no way that doesn't end badly. However, the date became significantly less awkward as it progressed and I even ended it with a quick kiss. Based on how awfully it had begun, I thought I'd pulled off quite the coup and quickly set up a second date. Then, the day before, she texted me saying she didn't think we should hang out tomorrow. When I asked why, she was evasive and vague, but eventually she revealed that another guy had asked her if she'd be his girlfriend. Yes, he actually asked her that. And, no, these aren't highschooler's we're talking about. She went on to say that she hadn't given him an answer yet and I stupidly said I'd been hoping that she'd be my girlfriend. That lead to her revealing that she'd said yes, after over an hour of texting back and forth with her. At this point, I should've seen reason and closed the door on her, right then and there. I didn't, and later that night we had a text exchange in which she told me she would dump her newly-minted boyfriend, just that she didn't want to do it via text. Come the next day, though, she was listed as "seeing someone" on OkCupid and, after more or less ignoring my messages for a while, finally made it clear that she was staying with this guy. But I made the stupid decision to stay friends with her and, long story short, she continued to act as if nothing had changed, blatantly flirting with me every chance she got, even going so far as to hold my hand and refer to me using pet names, all while dating this poor sap. And I played along, hoping she'd finally see reason and do what she'd told me she was going to do in the first place, which is dump him and get with me, not thinking that I'd probably just end up getting the same treatment eventually, as well. Once I stopped being blind to her overwhelming craziness, I cut off all ties and gave her the title of the first person I've ever truly hated, as well as the name Crazy Hipster Bitch. Looking back, I should have seen it all coming. Her craziness, most of all, but also her hipsterish tendencies. Nowadays, whenever I see someone who only lists bands and the like that your average person hasn't heard of, I immediately move onto the next girl, not wanting a repeat of CHB. It's because that means one of two things. Either you're a hipster or you're trying way too hard to sound different. Similarly, people who say they'll watch, listen to, or read anything aren't fooling anyone. They want to fool people into thinking they're open-minded when, in reality, they're probably just as big a sheep as anyone else. So says the guy who says exactly that in his own profile. The difference is, though, I wouldn't put it unless I truly meant it, which I do. I'm the sort of guy who will readily watch a sequel to a movie that made him nauseous. I think that qualifies as open-minded. Watching an indie movie or two does not.