Okay, so we're going to get a little more real with you now. More real than seven-foot tall, shape shifting space lizards who feed on the blood of humans and are probably also paedophiles? Yes, we'll manage it somehow. Over the years the Illuminati have stood in for any number of cultural bogeymen from (sigh, yes) Jewish people to expanding government powers to the free market economy to aliens. Whilst there's been a kernel of truth to at least some theories about a New World Order - and some confirmed examples of them existing in various forms, too - the most compelling piece of evidence may be happening right now. Because right now, the most common targets for accusations of being members of the Illuminati and spreading their message are celebrities. There's all the pop and rap stars we've already been through, but plenty of other big name public figures have been said to be part of the shadowy group that's controlling the world, the puppet masters to our poor, naïve marionettes: TV presenters, Hollywood actors, celebrity chefs. You name them, there's probably a place for them in the vast networked conspiracy of those that control our every move and affect the chance they want to see in the world. And you know what? That's something you can't actually deny. TV stars frequently use their celebrity to campaign for presidential candidates, and spread their political views to a prime time audience. Hollywood actors become part of NATO peace envoys and visit over countries, hoping to change things. Celebrity endorsements will try and convince you into everything from who you vote for to what shampoo you use. Whether or not they're part of a secret society like the Illuminati, there's no denying that famous people do sort of have control of our minds. Which is terrifying even without the pyramids and stuff.
Tom Baker is the Comics Editor at WhatCulture! He's heard all the Doctor Who jokes, but not many about Randall and Hopkirk. He also blogs at http://communibearsilostate.wordpress.com/
