Also Known As: Gramps, The Bitter Old Man, The GeezerIdentifying Traits: The Dinosaur has been working for this company since long before you were alive. Back in his day, people worked hard and showed proper respect for authority. He doesn't like you blasted young whippersnappers with your purple hair and your piercings and your hop-hip jungle music, and he's going to make damn sure you know about it. Native Habitat: A better, simpler time, when the men were men and the women knew their place. The Dinosaur is fully convinced the world started going straight to hell in a handbasket when women began wearing pants and driving cars. If you call him a sexist, he will thank you for the compliment. He enjoys ranting on the internet about how much he detests the modern world, and he totally doesn't understand why anyone would regard that as hypocritical or ironic. Career Trajectory: The Dinosaur knows he might keel over and die at any moment from the combined effects of age and bitterness. He knows full well that when this happens, his job is likely to be filled by a pink-haired 20-year old girl named Dakota who doesn't shave her legs and grew up with two mommies. And this just makes him angrier. In fact, resentment is pretty much the only thing keeping The Dinosaur alive at this point.
Recovering print journalist, writing professionally since 1991, polluting the internet and wasting the world's bandwidth since 1995. Board-certified Doctor of Memetics and Trollology, offering free consultations to qualified patients.
