10 Things You Want To Do To Justin Bieber After His Childish Deposition Video

7. Have Him Work At An Old Folks Home

I think the one thing a kid skyrocketed into fame so early proves is that he has no respect his elders. We're talking the tough old cuss' of yesteryear, who fought in the great wars and remember the British invasion as the second coming of Christ versus Bieber's invasion as the beast with seven heads emerging from the sea. These people grew up during the greatest musical revolution of all time €“ in the 20th Century alone we saw the birth and evolution of all major genres like jazz, rock and roll, country, pop, big band and swing, punk, metal, and hip hop. To think that Justin Bieber is the culmination of that musical revolution is enough to tear a hole in the fabric of space and time. So we need these seasoned veterans of a bygone era to teach the kid some manners. And the greatest thing about them is that usually after 70 they just stop caring. They get to be loud and angry and racist and no one gets to tell them no. Someone is going to need to change their diapers, distribute an impossible amount of pills into those little "Monday through Sunday" organisers, read the daily bulletin, and lead the rec room in morning prayer. Who's going to summarise the list of available activities this week, push wheelchairs, or reinsert catheters and colostomy bags when they inevitably fall out? Someone's gotta do it. I think that should keep the kid busy enough to make him rethink talking back to people of authority. They didn't fight and die in our wars to be sassed by some little punk, damn it. Now go fetch them their crosswords!