15 Signs You're In An Abusive Relationship With Your Cat
5. They Lick Between Their Legs In Public
Eventually you get over that brief moment of love between your guest and cat, Brad Kitt, and you both, with cat in tow, head into the living room to drink the coffee (stopping only to put a cushion on top of the ripped part of the new couch). You talk about the ups and downs of modern life and, with Kitt there listening to you, you feel like a real grown up, content with your house, cat and friends. Suddenly and without warning, Kitt's eyes glaze over, and it's clear he's bored by the fact that he starts licking his private parts with the gusto of an old man eating soup.
"You see this? This is what I think of your pathetic human lives. Id pity you but licking my privates is of more importance to me than your stupid lives."
Inevitably, after 20 minutes of mesmerising scrotal "cleaning". your guest makes their excuses and leaves.
