16 Problems Only People From Madison Wisconsin Will Understand

3. Someone Just Handed You A Turkey Hot Dog...At A Tailgate

I'm sorry what...what the hell is this? Why is it so small and not soaked in a beer glaze or filled with cheese? Seriously, where are the brats, Kevin? Is this a joke? Look, either I get a brat on this bun in the next five seconds or I'm going to go all Mason Crosby on your genitals, Kevin. Do you understand me? You said you had everything covered for this tailgate, so I ask again: WHERE IS MY BRAT, YOU SADIST? Also, I'm looking around right now and I don't see any condiment besides ketchup. Tell me there is mustard and sauerkraut in your trunk or so help me...