18 Problems Only Pale People Will Understand

9. You Practically Glow In The Dark

Buena Vista PicturesBuena Vista PicturesIt's not possible for humans to actually be phosphorescent, but pale-skinned folk come pretty darn close. When you're pale, you have no camouflage, nor is there any hiding in the dark: any scrap of light will inevitably find its way to you and reflect off your skin, giving off an unmistakable pale-person glow. As annoying as it is, it could almost make sense that people joke about their fair-skinned friends being ghosts; they certainly do have somewhat of an otherworldly appearance, walking around visible even on the darkest nights. But at least pale people don't have to worry about carrying a torch; in a pinch, their skin will do the trick.

8. Sunburn Happens Almost Instantly

FOXFOXA pale person stepping out into the sunlight is like a magnet being dropped into a dish of iron: within seconds, every possible scrap of energy from the sun will be trained directly on them. Once this happens, there is no turning back, because pale skin burns in no time at all- and, even worse, you can feel it happening. At first, it may seem okay: the sun is manageable, albeit very hot. Within minutes however, you'll start to feel the heat permeate the first few layers of your skin. Shortly after that, a slight pink tinge will start to spread. And after that? Doom. Then again, if you're foolish enough to go out without sun cream, you brought this upon yourself. Learn from all our mistakes!

7. Finding Makeup In The Right Shade Is Nearly Impossible

Sony PicturesSony PicturesPale people might as well use white-out as a concealer because, no matter how light-sounding the name of the makeup is - €œalabaster,€ €œivory,€ porcelain,€ etc. - it will inevitably be a lovely shade of orange once actually applied to the skin. Fair-skinned girls around the world have been forced to either learn to live with their blemishes or spend hours perfecting a blend of their makeup to make it less egregiously orange - and even then, they're risking the major fashion faux-pas of having their faces mismatched with their bodies. In reality, flawless complexions are the stuff of legend for pale girls because the makeup market is apparently incapable of mixing the right pigments together. Gee, thanks.
 
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Contributor

College kid with an affinity for sarcasm and sleeping too much.