It's all suddenly become so clear. Here we all were imagining that Dennis Wise's public outburst labelling Newcastle fans are little more than racists against Cockneys was part of a PR campaign of deflection aimed to distract everyone from how terrible the team are doing on the pitch. With PR and crisis management supremo Keith Bishop parachuted in - apparently he's too special for normal transport methods - and stories of Roy Keane hating Newcastle as much as the current crop of players suspiciously love Pardew, the puzzle pieces were all in place for it just to be another bit of spin. But if you look a little deeper, there is something in Dennis Wise's past that could well have haunted him, and turned him against Geordies forever. Step forward Paul John Gascoigne, footballing wizard, dyed-in-the-wool Geordie and absolute walking nightmare. Gazza was a law unto himself, and was entertained by all manner of things that normal people would find perverse and outrageous like telling Denmark to "f*ck off" or putting cat sh*t in a pie for his best mate. He was, inevitably, drawn to pranks and one fateful day with England he turned his attention to Dennis Wise. Or more specifically, Dennis Wise's no doubt super-flash Armani suit, which he shredded "for a laugh". Funny from the outside, but imagine Dennis' little face as he returned from training to find his best - and most expensive - clothes utterly ruined and a destructive Geordie standing laughing uproariously in his face. No reasoning, no logic, just pure unadulterated destruction for the sake of it. And because Wise was one of those players who always played like he thought he was the centre of the universe, he no doubt imagined that the prank was a slight against his very being - that Gazza was protesting against Wise being Wise, a tenacious Cockney fire-brand. So of course he thinks we hate him: one of the most notable Geordies of all time personally slighted him, and rather than taking it as the joke it was intended as (it was probably always difficult to tell what Gazza's message was with his "jokes") Wise has instead harboured feelings of anxiety for his whole life that an entire region is on the verge of shredding all of his lovely suits. The poor love.
