The reality television boom hit us all pretty hard as soon as networks copped on to the fact that they could create these programs with a very loose narrative at a fraction of the cost of traditional scripted shows, it was over. But while some of the reality shows make sense (The Bachelor, for example man looking for wife, pretty straightforward), there are others that were just bizarre, and it makes you wonder exactly what the producers were thinking when they gave them the green light. After a certain amount of time, viewers aren't going to be satisfied with your average, run-of-the-mill reality show about dating or renovating a house or winning a lot of money. If we wanted that, we would just do it ourselves. Most reality shows deal with things that we can relate to, and blow them up into a large, uber-publicized version of themselves. So naturally the only appropriate response is for the producers to come up with absurd shows that are so far removed from reality that it's actually a little bit terrifying that someone's mind barfed up these ideas.
10. Vanilla Ice Goes Amish
Vanilla Ice was the quintessential white rapper of the early 1990s, famous for such musical genius as Ice Ice Baby. Nowadays, he struggles to maintain a foothold in the entertainment industry, taking cameos in any projects that pay money. So it's actually not that surprising that Vanilla Ice would find himself part of a ridiculous reality show -- we're far more taken aback by the fact that anyone thought a show about Vanilla Ice living with the Amish would be a good idea. From the very beginning of the show, when we hear that the theme song is a redneck acoustic version of Ice Ice Baby, it's a train wreck. Essentially, the show revolves around Ice, who is moving into an Amish settlement to learn their ancient art of furniture making. The Amish help him with a variety of projects, from tables and chairs to traditional barn-raising, all without the use of nails and screws (which are apparently too ungodly for them to use). The show aired on DIY Network last year -- no word yet on whether or not we'll be seeing more Witness-style exploits from Ice.
Audrey Fox is an ex-film student, which means that she prefers to spend her days in the dark, watching movies and pondering the director's use of diegetic sound. She currently works as an entertainment writer, joyfully rambling about all things film and television related. Add her on Twitter at @audonamission and check out her film blog at 1001moviesandbeyond.com.
