10 Lessons Doctor Who Teaches Us About Christmas

The artificial Christmas tree industry is blossoming despite claims in some quarters that they are in fact more harmful to the environment than a cut tree. The appeal is not so much guilt at killing off an evergreen, as it is the convenience factor. These days they are more realistic than ever and many come ready assembled, complete with lights and decorations.

Even the shopping malls and town centres have traded the real deal for these artificial wonders and every year they boast new and improved features. In Manchester’s Trafford Centre for instance, a giant Christmas tree talks from its trunk, frightening the life out of young toddlers but delighting their parents with its charms.

But if you’re thinking of going down the artificial route at home, just be careful about some of the special features your new tree might come with. Read the small print. If its musical, you might want to resist a purchase, but if it also spins or moves automatically in any way then avoid it like the plague.

Roboform Christmas trees have twice infiltrated UK homes. The first time they attacked with their razor sharp leaves (The Christmas Invasion), and the second time they were decorated with baubles that were in fact bombs (The Runaway Bride)

The only sure fire way to stop them is a good blast with a sonic screwdriver, but since the Doctor is probably too busy drinking sherry in the TARDIS, or defying a fixed point in time by returning to New York, then you might be better off settling for the natural option this year.