Okay, so first things first. A lot of the chatter about Ms Stackhouse and her barely controlled fascination with vampire nookie neglects one very important fact; until Bill Compton arrived on the scene, Sookie was unable to hold down any form of romantic relationship due to the crippling effects of her involuntary mind-reading on her love life. Her sudden realisation that vampires are immune to it opened the floodgates to some seriously pent-up tides in the deep south, if you know what we mean (and we think you do). So lets quit it with the slut-shaming language here, boys and girls. If you were a hot slice of apple pie left on the shelf for years, youd want to get bitten every once in a while too. That said, Sookies a very confused young woman, and with good reason. Both Eric and Bill take some significant liberties with her over the first four seasons. Both find a way to get her to drink their blood to establish a mental connection and further their secret schemes, and then both get in way over their heads and declare their undying love for her - 'undying' actually meaning something in this instance. Both obsessively refuse to let her do her own thing under the guise of wanting to protect her. Neither can be trusted. Warlow looked like he might be an antidote to all that sneaky old testosterone, being part fairy himself until they pulled the rug out from under him in the season finale. That leaves us with Alcide, whose thoughts she can hear - but hey, maybe that mysterious six month gap made her learn how to block them out, or some other thing that doesnt make sense. Now, Alcides got anger management issues and turns into a big dog on occasion, making him the most normal boyfriend Sookie's ever had. Naturally, this means that we dont get to see anything about their new and exciting relationship, because this show is not about Sookie being happy. Its about Sookie being used by vampires. She's a little blonde chess piece in a summer dress, and that's just not right. Except
Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.
