10 Things About October Faction That Make Absolutely No Sense

The same can’t be said of the kids themselves. Geoff (Gabriel Darku) and Viv (Aurora Burghart) are warlocks, but they aren't monsters. They are thoroughly obnoxious though (which in genre television is tantamount to the same thing), particularly Geoff, who manages the trick of being arrogant, clingy, shallow and pretentious all at once, sometimes in the same scene.

There's always a possibility that these insufferable children are being played by poor actors, of course. It doesn’t help that the dialogue for these teenagers appears to have been written in a foreign language by someone much, much older and then badly translated into English. There's a fine line between poor performance from mediocre writing and mediocre performance from poor writing, and Darku, Burghart and Kindler's writers are pegged to that line like wet towels.

Talking about terrible acting - Anwen O’Driscoll appears to be playing Viv's best friend Cathy as though she’s perpetually coming up on mushrooms, which together with probably the worst dialogue in the show (and that's saying something - 'seen it all' monster hunting veteran Fred Allen seems to spend half of his time saying "what the f**k?!" about pretty much nothing at all) scuppers any chance of relating to her, too.

If you don't count the psychotic warlock Alice - who strings up an innocent woman's corpse over a tub to bathe in her blood - there are no likeable or relatable characters in this show... which is a problem if you want us to care what happens to them.