10 Things We Learned From Twin Peaks: The Return Part 14
8. Diane Is Related To Janey-E
The only unintentional sense of dread looming over what was an otherwise perfect marriage of Lynch's subconscious and Mark Frost's narrative sensibilities concerned Diane Evans.
"Deputy Diane reporting," she announced herself in the meeting of the FBI minds, with a hilariously detached deadpan. Albert notified her of the ring, inscribed "To Dougie with love, Janey-E," - at which point Diane, either staying true to her self or doing a phenomenal job as a double agent (there's a reason, however obtuse it might seem, why Laura Dern was cast), mouthed "Oh my God."
She then revealed - adding yet another convoluted and initially incredulous layer to an utterly complex character - that her half-sister's nickname is Janey-E, and she's married to a Dougie Jones. "We're estranged. I hate her. So I haven't talked to her in years." More superb deadpan line readings aside - enough years for her to have not seen Dougie's actual face, which fatty jowls aside is identical to Dale Cooper's? Is this a plot hole, or is it asking something major from the audience in a Marty McFly/Calvin Klein-type scenario?
The revelation of Diane's motive(s) is crucial to the success of The Return - or at least its congruity, which is more significant than you'd have thought, pre-May 21. That revelation remains elusive.