10 Worst Things Sterling Archer Has Ever Done

Before there was baby AJ, there was the 'wee baby Sheamus', the infant son of Trinette McGoon, Archer's favourite escort. Sheamus is initially set up to be Archer's son, but it's quickly revealed that he shares as much genetic material with Archer as he does with Ray, that is to say, none. You'd assume, after finding this out that any and all contact between Archer and his 'nearly' son would stop, but you'd be wrong.

Upon finding out that he has breast cancer, Archer asks Trenette if he can "spend some time with the wee baby Sheamus", which considering "he's not even [his] real kid", is pretty wierd. But, as Archer doesn't know what might happen with his treatment, Trenette lets him.

However, this turns out, unsurprisingly, to be a terrible idea, and when Sterling brings the little one back to his mother, he reveals that not only has he had Sheamus's name tattooed on his back, but that he has also had his name tattooed of Sheamus's.

I repeat, Sterling Malory Archer, had his name tattooed on a baby's back! Which he argues is awesome, because it’s “like [they’ve] got each other’s backs.”

This would clearly be a terrible, terrible thing to do even if it’s your own child, but Archer did it to a baby with which he essentially has no connection making it a thousand times worse! It is arguably the most reckless thing the man has ever done and therefore is also one of the worst.