8 Most Overused Words In Doctor Who Fandom

7. Squee

At the heart of every €œfangasm€ is an almighty climax accompanied by the squee. It often involves coffee being spilt on keyboards or the falling off of chairs, and yet strangely the victim is still able to casually type up this information. Some Doctor Who fans can have multiple climaxes and the intensity of each can be marked by the number of e's added to the end of this bizarre word. A squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, therefore, denotes the best orgasm ever. Steven Moffat orchestrates the first group squee when he writes the squee into the script of Dark Water/Death In Heaven. It would not be a surprise if several fans posted "squee" when Seb squeed on screen. For some fans the squee is remarkably easy to achieve. Mention of a returning foe or character last seen a few weeks ago can be enough for the lucky fan to emit a triple squeee. Even a returning prop might press all the right buttons. There is, of course, nothing wrong with being enthusiastic about a programme that's so loved and treasured. Sadly, though, the squee is often all too premature and the poor fan is left disheartened, having realised their mistake post squee. The voice in the trailer for Series 8 was not Davros, but Rusty. That was, for many, one wasted climax. Perhaps to save face, the keyboard and various parts of the anatomy, the squee should be replaced by a pensive squeak. Just in case that person in the shadows on the set report photo turns out to have been Bob the clapperboard operator and not John Simm. Or if a person must squee, then at least keep it private, behind closed doors.
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Paul Driscoll is a freelance writer and author across a range of subjects from Cult TV to religion and social policy. He is a passionate Doctor Who fan and January 2017 will see the publication of his first extended study of the series (based on Toby Whithouse's series six episode, The God Complex) in the critically acclaimed Black Archive range by Obverse Books. He is a regular writer for the fan site Doctor Who Worldwide and has contributed several essays to Watching Books' You and Who range. Recently he has branched out into fiction writing, with two short stories in the charity Doctor Who anthology Seasons of War (Chinbeard Books). Paul's work will also feature in the forthcoming Iris Wildthyme collection (A Clockwork Iris, Obverse Books) and Chinbeard Books' collection of drabbles, A Time Lord for Change.