8 Ups & 1 Down For Star Trek: Lower Decks 5.8: Upper Decks

Reg Barclay had the whole barely pronounceable syndrome named after him. Fortunately, Officer Barnes was spared that humiliating fate, worse than the condition itself. In this case, the "Zerta pathogen" caused Barnes to evolve and devolve. In the immortal words of Doctor T'Ana, "She was a futuristic cave woman who could read minds but was also afraid of open flame".

No matter the transformation/de-transformation, Barnes had still sussed out the sousaphone…ish… much to the chagrin of Captain Freeman who had to attend a recital in the bar. Come now, Carol! Barnes' rhythmic blowing was "hardly affected by [her] protruding brow". It certainly wasn't any worse than having to sit through Mr. Bingston's one-man-show-monologue! What was he doing on the holodeck? You can't blame the nodding off on interdimensional aliens this time, Steve Stevens!

Ensign Barnes' relatively light and on key performance couldn't hold (or think of) a candle to what she did next with her instrument. Barnes thoroughly upped the beat, of the Clickets, around the head, with said sousaphone. She then went full-on freestyle jazz, reflecting and deflecting disruptor fire back at the beastly invaders. "I'm just glad you don't play the recorder," was Captain Freeman's hilarious retort.

Well, we all wish her a speedy, continued recovery in her de-transformation. Otherwise, there's not a replicator large enough for that pair of tweezers!