3. Eric Roberts - Doctor Who The Movie
"This. Is. An. Ambulance!!!" The Master, then. The Doctor's greatest nemesis, his equal and opposite in every single way. While The Doctor uses his scientific knowledge for the good of all the universe, The Master applies his skills as a tactician, inventor and hypnotist to the goal of galactic conquest. The Doctor opposes authoritarian regimes wherever he finds them- The Master wishes to install himself as Grand Dictator of the Cosmos. The Doctor looks like he picked a fight in the men's section of Oxfam- The Master always dresses in black, because black is the universally acknowledged shade of b**tardry. The Doctor is the quintessential English eccentric, except he's not- he's half-Time Lord half-human, as the 1996 TV Movie reveals. The Master, at least for the duration of the movie, is again, the inverse - he's a loud-mouthed pseudo Yank in aviator shades and slicked back hair who can shoot, em, sticky stuff from his mouth. Equals and opposites, equals and opposites... Since the TV Movie has the perfect Doctor (Paul McGann woz robbed) it was inevitable that The Master would be the right Master for this particular production (which, as Doctor Who Magazine best put it, is a 'tribute to Anglo-American fudge and compromise) while also being completely terrible. And the actor responsible for this dichotomous interpretation of the renegade Time Lord? Why, only Eric bloody Roberts, still most famous for not being his sister. Because Eric is an American, not British, ham, there's a lethal, precision engineered quality to his over-acting- it's almost joyless. That impression is emphasised by the show's direction, which 'borrows' from Terminator 2. For most of the running time, The Master barely speaks and looks like a weedier version of Arnie. Roberts is content to let his shades do the acting for him and can barely hide his disdain at the more specific elements of series continuity ("That's what he calls himself- Doktah!"- he says, for some reason slipping into a Mockney accent). For the finale, he changes tack, swanning about in a cape that's far too big for him and purring such delicious come-ons as "I always like to dress for the occasion." Yes, he's playing The Master as Liberace. I'm not going to judge him too harshly for it, though. Other, better actors have fallen under the character's mesmeric grip...
Most OTT Moment: The movie's 'stand-out action set piece' is a motorcycle chase down a freeway littered with stray chickens (aye, stray chickens. This s**t is complex like The Wire). It kicks off when The Master, still incognito, hijacks an ambulance to abduct The Doctor. But because he's Eric Roberts (oh, and also has bright green eyes) The Doctor catches on and tries to scarper. It's at this moment that The Master starts spitting what appears to be, well, a substance that looks very very rude (he's doing it from his mouth, but still...), grogging away like a demented pillhead until he gets some of it down his chin ("Get if off me!!! Get if off me!!!"). The Doctor affects an escape, while poor The Master is left with nothing more than an unflattering screen capture. He may look acutely daft, but any actor willing to pretend he has, ah, gluey white fluid ejaculating...from his throat...well, they're alright by me.