Every Episode Of Tiger King Ranked

All hail the Tiger King! Actually, please don't and, please, may he never ever reign again.

Tiger King
Netflix

Hey there all you cool cats and kittens! So 2020 has been going pretty smoothly recently, at least that's what we're telling ourselves with the help of the "special" prescription our legitimate doctor gave us.

But legal, non-back alley pharmaceuticals aside, we all need a good distraction from the real world sometimes and goddamn were we in luck with Tiger King! Which, ironically, is a documentary based entirely in reality. Ain't it interesting how life imitates art...or whatever. We're not entirely sure how to use that phrase.

But hot damn if Tiger King didn't have everything! It had big cats, psychopaths, big cats, murder, great big cats, a presidential campaign. great big goddamn cats, polygamy, great big goddamn freaking cats and someone might have been killed and fed to some great big goddamn freaking cats! And thanks to it coming out at the time it did, we bet Amazon's sales of corkboards, string and drawing pins have went up ten-fold.

We'll be straight with you guys, this was a tough as hell article because, to be honest, so much happens in this show that all the insanity sort of blends into one after a while. We found ourselves writing up an entry only to realise that a few of the things listed actually happened in completely different episodes. It was a tough order, but we hunkered down and managed to rank, by level of insanity, each episode of a TV show that is the very definition of "Wait...WHAT?!"

7. Episode Seven - Dethroned

Tiger King
Netflix

Dethroned is still a crazy episode, but it's only really crazy because of what preceded it. As well as that, this episode is a different brand of crazy to the rest of the series. Whilst the previous six episodes - for the most part - are off the wall insane just because it seems almost impossible that this human being actually exists or that any of the events depicted transpired, Dethroned is crazy more because of what feels like some pretty egregious oversights in the justice system.

Frankly it seems astounding that Joe Exotic was the only person who ended up behind bars by the end of this series. Don't get us wrong, Joe deserved it. He embezzled money, he was a predator, he was abusive, he ordered a hit on someone and he was very much guilty of severe animal cruelty on numerous counts, but...seriously, guys, surely at least Allen Glover deserved to serve at least a bit of time! They literally have a recording of him saying he'd be willing to off Carole Baskin and the only reason he didn't was because Joe couldn't cough up enough dough! Doesn't that count for something?

Also, can we all just take a moment to think about that scene where Jeff Lowe says to his wife that she needs to get to the gym after having a baby...and then follows it up by saying he gets to choose the nanny since he "has to look at her"...then shows the camera some photos. Let us all collectively shudder.

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Johnny sat by the fire, idly swirling his brandy, flicking through the pages of War and Peace, wondering whether it was pretentious to write his bio in the third person.