Father Ted: 12 Funniest Episodes

3. Escape From Victory/Kicking Bishop Brennan Up The Arse

These two episodes deserve to be judged as one, considering they share the same overall plot, merely split into two. Much like the Lent episode, and the Song For Europe special, here we see Craggy Island pit themselves against Rugged Island, this time in the name of the over-75 all-priests five-a-side football match. Obviously. Rugged Island have the Italian stardust of Father Romeo Sensini, who "can climb two flights of stairs" and "only needs one nun to help him out of a chair". On average in these matches, that makes him a star player. The Lionel Messi of the island manages to score a goal, but most hilariously of all, an unconscious Jack, sitting in a remote-controlled wheelchair, manages to equalise, which is obviously against the rules. As Ted has cheated, Ted must do the forefit, which in-keeping with his ludicrous fear of the bishop means kicking him up the arse. This is when the plot really descends into constant laugh-out-loud humour, as the Bishop makes his journey to the island with his PA, the sarcastic Father Jessop. Ted's resignation to his fate, and sheer terrified demeanour as he wrestles with what he has to do, is priceless, but best of all is when the deed is done, and Bishop Brennan interrupts his audience with the Pope by snapping out of his shocked trance and shrieking, "He DID kick me up the arse!" Religion just isn't that entertaining in the real world.