Which is Better: Dinosaurs on a Spaceship or Snakes on a Plane?

The most recent episode of Doctor Who has raised a serious question here at the WhatCulture! offices, which is better: Dinosaurs on a Spaceship (DOAS) or Snakes on a Plane (SOAP)?

The most recent episode of Doctor Who has raised a serious question here at the WhatCulture! offices, which is better: Dinosaurs on a Spaceship (DOAS) or Snakes on a Plane (SOAP)? Using a completely unbiased and scientific method, the crack team of me will determine which is better, DOAS or SOAP, based on a cumulative score in three areas: Cast, Creatures and Curses.

Cast

DOAS: The Doctor, Nefertiti, Hunter Guy, Amy Pond, Rory Pond and Danish catering officer Olaf Petersen. SOAP: Samuel €œMother F***€™€ Jackson Sam and The Doctor cancel one another out. Nefertiti & Hunter Guy are ho-hum, so no score. Amy Pond and Rory Pond are a big negative, which drags DOAS into the red. Amy for trying to slide into the main character slot, usurping The Doctor. Rory because he€™s a bumbling vagina. The series can€™t get rid of them fast enough. Luckily Olaf Petersen saves the day. Those of you awesome enough to get the reference understand why. Score: 1 Point DOAS

Creatures

DOAS: Dinosaurs - Triceratops, raptors, pterodactyls, ankylosaurus. SOAP: Snakes. Although Dr. Jones vehemently disagrees with me, dinosaurs are the far greater of the reptilian adversaries in these two shows. That€™s even taking into account that triceratops are nothing more than gigantic puppy dogs with the instinctual ability to fetch. That is, so long as the ball has grass smell. Score: 1 Point DOAS

Curses

DOAS: None SOAP: None Interestingly enough, whereas neither DOAS nor SOAP have a curse, The Asylum has a film, Snakes on a Train (SOAT), a mockbuster which actually beat SOAP to release, does have an ancient Mayan curse which is the impetus for the story. I€™m not really giving anything away that the title of the film doesn€™t. Even if I did, if you€™ve ever watched an Asylum film you know there€™s nothing to give away. Score: 1 Point SOAT. Considering it wasn€™t part of the competition, who cares. Which brings us to the result. Assuming my math is correct, it looks like DOAS, with 2 points, is the winner. Amazing, really, considering the Doctor didn€™t use the magical sonic screwdriver to rig the voting. Or did he? Next €œWhich is Better€ Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies and Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter go head to head in a death-match battle royal. Don€™t miss it!
Contributor
Contributor

Aeryk is a delicate fondue of Viking and Cajun stock, with all the subtly, grace and refinement of a moonshine high colonic. He wiles away the late, late, late hours in orgies of sex and violence with the likes of "Sex With the Headless Corpse of the Virgin Astronaut". His iTunes library is named Bad Mother F****r despite the fact it has The Bangles Greatest Hits. At night his dreams are of being a paid para-professional, part-time writer.