10 Absolutely RIDICULOUS Wrestling Theme Lyrics

Where the kings (and the headliners and the midcarders and and the faces and the heels) bow down.


Nobody really pays attention to the lyrics.

Everybody is too busy going apesh*t in that white-hot moment following the sting; even the stunted, theatrical stylings of David Draiman's remix couldn't distract from Steve Austin's badass aura. When the glass shattered, we knew 'Stone Cold' was about to disrupt everything.

Several classic pro wrestling themes don't even include lyrics. Blessedly, no vocalist was tasked with describing the Ultimate Warrior, and more blessedly still, WWE tends not to license complementary mainstream songs as a cost-saving measure. We avoided the very apt 'One In A Million' by Guns N' Roses, and instead were enthralled by the super-energetic 'Unstable', and its elemental endorphin rush of frenetic rock riffs.

In modern times, lyrics are mostly avoided by the CFO$ duo and their looping fetish. This does not inhibit bangers. Johnny Gargano's clapping, soaring 'Rebel Heart' is a quality Jimmy Hart Version of a Coheed and Cambria tune. 'Undisputed' is an audacious funk rock jam that both mirrors the peacocking arrogance of the faction and acts as a conduit for Kyle O'Reilly's hammy awesomeness. 'Glorious Domination' would still generate a pop on Main Event...

...which is just as well, looking at the weather.

Some people bemoan the idea that practicality has squashed imagination - but it's probably for the best...


Former Power Slam Magazine scribe and author of Development Hell: The NXT Story - available NOW on shop.whatculture.com!