10 Absolutely RIDICULOUS Wrestling Theme Lyrics

3. Billy Kidman - You Can Run

SELF MADE
WWE.com

Which adjective is ideally used to describe a pro wrestling theme tune?

Powerful?

Rousing?

...Rapey?

You would think not, but it is impossible to disassociate the lyrics, the lyrics to a pro wrestling theme song, from the most reprehensible act a human being is capable of.

This hip-hop menacer broods in its introductory clash of drums and ominous synths. "You can run if you want to..." are the first lyrics heard, cruelly promising the victim a chance of survival. "...but you can't hide," the rapper follows up. This is fair. Billy Kidman is a fighting babyface, and he is simply advising his opponents that, look. You can taunt me backstage, you can drag my name in promos, but when I get you in that ring...

...I am going to sexually assault you.

"Keep actin' though, it's gonna get creepy."

What?

Does he mean "scary", using a weird synonym to shoehorn in a rhyme?

"All of a sudden, you're startin' to feel sleepy..."

Don't be alarmed. This is more clumsy than problematic. Those Rohypnol vibes are incidental; he is referring to a chinlock.

"But in these streets, when you doze off, you wake up wit'cha clothes off, ashamed, feelin' lost..."

Right, that settles it: Billy Kidman laces his rivals' drinks with incapacitating agents before committing major crimes on TV.

Should have called him Mickey Kidman.

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!