10 Hardcore Japanese Wrestling Stipulations You Won't Believe Are Real

2. Alligator Death Match

Oh come on! It's not the animals' fault you're insane!

The premise: the loser of the death match has to fight an alligator.

Hello, Matsunaga. It's good to see you again.

So not only is the death match itself utter carnage featuring barbed wire boards, barbed wire wrapped baseball bats, a bed of nails and a trip to the concession stand (got to stay true to your Tennessee routes), but the payoff is so laughably bad that it serves a stark reminder that none of this could ever possibly be worth it.

Simply put, the alligator is smarter than this.

It refuses to fight, opting instead to try and get out of the ring, rendering it the most sensible living thing featured in this entire article. The loser of the preceding match, Matsunaga, tries to get it riled up by lifting it by its tail and dumping it in a coffin that just happens to be in the ring (why not?), but no dice. The alligator simply will not play your stupid game and Matsunaga is forced to just stand there waiting for a tussle that never comes, hopefully while carefully examining all the choices that he's made so far in his life.

Last page now, what could possibly be left?