Batista Bomb? No, Batista bombed! For years, fans were wondering if Batista would ever return to WWE. For many, his most entertaining run in the company was his last run for his portrayal of a prima donna heel. His promo quitting the business while throwing a temper tantrum was pretty great for the big guy. Then he disappeared to try his hand at movies and MMA. When he finally did agree to return, he probably felt he'd be treated as a hero. After all, The Rock was more popular than ever when he came back. Likewise, Chris Jericho remains a fan favorite whenever he shows up. Batista was not so lucky. For weeks we were shown videos of the Batista of old and how he dominated his opponents. On his Raw debut, we just got an old Batista. The man was now in his mid 40s, hed lost a considerable amount of muscle mass, and he was wearing the infamous skinny jeans and a jacket that was meant for someone 20 years younger than him. Just as damning was that he hugged The Authority his first night in! Someone thought it would be a good idea to have the returning hero babyface warmly embrace the top heels in the company. It was all downhill from there. The Royal Rumble was coming up and WWE clearly positioned Batista as the favorite to win. No one else even seemed plausible. Fans began revolting as they wanted Daniel Bryan in the main-events, not Batista. The crowd started turning on Batista, and since he appeared to get visibly angered by this reaction, it just egged the fans on more. Bootista quickly became a thing, and The Animal was basically neutered. The company was forced to turn him heel and have him re-join Evolution, which also failed to excite fans. No other failed wrestler return so far has made WWE re-think their WrestleMania main event as well as months worth of storylines like Batista's did. That sad fact along with his going-through-the-motions ring work, and failure to connect with the crowd is what makes him the biggest fail in the history of WWE returns.
As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at."
Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week.
Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com
