If there were a statue given out at the Slammy Awards for "Most Deserving of a Punch in the Face," there's one man--and only one man--who would take that award home each and every year. His living room mantle would be overrun with bronze statues of his own face, which in all honesty, seems like the type of thing The Miz would actually have in his home anyways. But these bronzed faces would have a little replica of my clenched fist covering the worst parts of The Miz's obnoxious face. Which is...all of it. So ya know what, never mind. Forget the whole statue thing and somebody please just blast this guy in the front of his pompous head already. Preferably with a bronze statue of my fist. Please and thanks.
